would you like some more cheese?

I was reading a blog the other day and the girilie had lovely pictures of her cooking something delicious on it. I was jealous. If I made cornbread it’d be a picture of me stirring a jiffy box in a bowl and then trying to sneak something healthy in there. That’s about the extent of my ability. I have to admit- it’s sometimes hard for me to see how talented some other folks are, doesn’t that sound so HORRIBLE? It is horrible, I’m embarrassed. Sometimes I feel like I should be a full-time-working-out-of-the-home mom cause I don’t seemed programmed like the ones I know. I have no casserole dishes that I make, no amazing cooking skills, I don’t like babysitting, I’m very impatient and selfish and my talents always seem to lend themselves to a job setting. I love being with Summit, don’t misunderstand, and that is what has kept me with him for this long. But I want to be like other moms too, with all of their mad abilities that I seem to be missing. I want to see 4 ingredients and have the epiphany that I could make some insane tasting french dish. I just feel like whining today, I’m sorry. Yesterday I got an e-mail that said that the church won’t be needing me in two weeks. Tuesdays have been the highlight of my week, my time away from Summit being an adult. I’ve been learning so much about I’m passionate about and it’s going to end. I’ve been doing it for over two years. I understand, I’m not mad about this, it just hurts. I feel like one more line holding me here has been severed and I don’t know where to go.