I didn’t know what Summit wanted a half hour ago. You moms are chuckling at this b/c it’s frustrating when you want to help them and they just scream! I put him in his pack-n-play for his nap and 30 min. later he was still crying and quickly about to have a meltdown so I picked him up and put on the Postal Service. (always great in a pinch. I save them for emergencies) He immediately calmed down. I put him on the bed and lay beside him and he was being Mr. Charming, but then he started to get squirmy and wouldn’t be still. He was grabbing my ears, hair, shirt… anything to get closer to me, but it was like he couldn’t get close enough. I was trying to accommodate, but he was getting fussier. I propped myself on my elbows and he scooted himself under me, then he was still. It was strange how calm and still he got, like this is where I want to be, close to your heart. We stayed like that for awhile and I had this thought: This is how God feels about us. He wants to protect us like a mother hen, and we rest in the shadow of his wings. Sometimes we can’t get close enough to God, we hunger so much for him!
Then Summit got antsy. He wasn’t angry, just ready for the next thing. He began to kick off of my chest and stomach towards the edge of the bed. I held on to one of his ankles as he got closer, thinking, there is no way he’ll actually try to kick himself off the bed, but oh yes he did! The only thing keeping him from a long fall off the bed was me, against his will, holding on to him. I pulled him up, and he was grinning. I had another epiphany: This is how God is, he holds us, even when we don’t know it or even want his help. We want to do what we want to do, and he lets us, but he is still there, always there to keep us from disaster although there may be consequences (I put Summit back in his pack-n-play). How great is our God?