I haven’t really done a post that had anything to do with WS (William’s Syndrome) in awhile and today provided the perfect opportunity!
This morning as Bear was sitting on the potty, Ben brought in Bug to change his diaper because he’s a good daddy like that. Bug was screeching because he wanted a banana and it started to really bother Bear. Part of his having William’s Syndrome is he has sensory issues and sensitive hearing. He started to get really angry and yell at Bug to be quiet and when that didn’t work he started screaming back at him. They loudly went back and forth, each passionately furious. That was *pleasant*.
Me, being the protector, got mad at Ben for bringing in a screaming Bug because I knew it would bother Bear. I felt sorry for him and apologized to Bear while shooting a dirty look at Ben. I’m really mature like that. Side note: I’m not a morning person. I could hashtag that as #understatementoftheyear if I was on Twitter… but I’m not so that is kind of irrelevant… But anyways, Bug and Bear were both screaming, my ears was ringing and Ben was unfazed like usual and suddenly it was a snap shot of my life. Like this moment some how was the classic picture summarizing all aspects in my life. It is just a busy, insane time of my life where I’m reacting to things that happen to me and feel out of control. I hate feeling out of control, one of my goals this year it to be more intentional… about everything.
After than *fun* episode, Bear went into the living room and found his “acorder”, accordion, and started playing it with as much passion as an inebriated German at Oktoberfest. He laughs like ringing bells and smiles until his eyes are little crescents, just like his Aunt. I’m always so torn between breaking the accordion in half and encouraging his musical ability, because, like one well meaning friend said when I told her Bear had WS said, “At least he’ll have a good musical ability” and I”m kind of worried that he won’t. Not like it’s super important that he does have great musical ability, I’m just worried deep down that he won’t have the gifts of WS, just the health issues. That would suck! To have only the bad parts and not be extremely gifted in some way that would distinguish him. I know that’s a parent’s worry, that their child some how won’t fit in and I already know mine won’t for the most part. I guess I feel like it he’s good at music then maybe it will break down walls that are put up before him.
On the top of the entertainment center gathering dust are his other instruments he always wants out but I can’t stand to hear as often as he would like to play them: his harmonica, recorder, play guitar & some wooden instrument I have no idea what it’s called but it’s very clacky so I kinda keep it hidden. I’ve never seen a kid so into music. Every day he asks to play the violin and guitar and I’m getting to the point that I’m feeling like I’m holding him back. Maybe he’d be a prodigy playing the violin or guitar and it’s all my fault for not getting him into lessons! Self-deprecating aside, this is part of my being intentional in my life. Actually calling around to get prices instead of feeling guilty because that is SO extremely productive. I think every mom feels like this though. Doubting, punishing for imperfection and fear that some how our inaction will harm them. I just need to relax and realize that I am really not that powerful. I’m glad it’s not up to me because that would be a sad thing indeed.
PS If you would like to read more about William’s Syndrome written from a perspective from someone on the outside looking in, check out the amazing post by Jasmine at The Brokins where she way over compliments me! HA HA she makes me look GOOD so you really should read it. and comment. 
**********UPDATE
I found this short, very cute and interesting video made by abc news about Williams Syndrome. I got it from William’s Syndrome Web Watch, a blog by a daddy to a child with WS. Thought it seemed appropriate!
