I’ve been reflecting a lot lately… by ‘lately’ I mean, bits and pieces here and there in between changing diapers, cooking gluten free, taking up running, blogging and stuffing my face with delicious holiday foods…
yeah, there hasn’t been much time for personal reflection and introspective thinking but as I sit here feeling pleasantly full and warm with a fuzzy blanket, this year rolls by in my mind.
Bug was just a baby then, back in January, barely crawling and now he’s a talking, crazy eating and running machine. I can’t believe the difference a year makes! I was on an elimination diet at the time because Bug had a huge open sore on his face from his undiagnosed allergies. He is healthy now and I’m still shocked that there isn’t a huge scar left on his face.
Bear has slowly and steadily progressed this year, nothing quick or amazing, but all of that slow and steady progression has resulted in a huge difference in between January and now. There is still so much I wish he was doing and sometimes I get frustrated with his lack of abilities but his sweet nature overwhelms all my doubts. I had a friend tell me recently I can’t protect him forever and the gravity of that statement is still with me. I know that I can’t but there is a constant war in my heart.
Ben is still searching for a job that gives him satisfaction and meaning. He may have found one, I think that sometimes I’m scared to hope so I haven’t really allowed myself to think about it very much. It’s been a hard year for us, but we are still together, growing and still immature in a lot of ways, but committed.
and me. This year has been full of many ups and downs. Overall my heart is happy and I am content where I am for the first time in a long time. I think admitting to myself a lot of things helped clear the slate and it’s almost like my life has started to be beautiful and make sense. I’ve learned boundaries, what real friends are and how to believe in myself. I love blogging, fashion and crafts and this year has been rich and full of a deep breath of LIFE.
I don’t like to make New Years Resolutions because my rebellious nature prickles against the self- inflicted rules, BUT if I were to make goals… They’d have to be:
-Continue on my Couch-to-5k journey. I’m beginning to start to enjoy running and the supportive community I have on Facebook and Twitter has been a constant encouragement.
-I want to go to 1-2 blogging conferences. Arkansas Women Bloggers for sure and hopefully a bigger one like Relevent, BlogHer or Blissdom.
-In the same vein, I also want to be regular with my posts. I want to continue to post on all my interests but post on personal issues as well. I love connecting on deeper levels with people and sharing is a type of therapy! I can’t wait to work with new people and look forward to all the great guest posts that I’m lining up as well as guest posting on other pages.
-I want to eat healthier. It’d be great if Dr. Pepper ceased to be a daily thought… sigh… I can dream, but I am choosing health in 2012. I want to eat all organically and all-naturally as much as I can. I’m not perfect and when I mess up, it’s OK! My goal is flexible but my compass keeps me on track. I may go in all sort of directions but I have my constant pull towards what I want in my life.
I’m excited about this year that is upon us. I have hope and excitement! I think part of this is that I’m not starting new goals, just modifying and refining the healthy habits that I’ve been working on all year. I’d love to hear your own goals and resolutions, share. If you blog, please include a link so I can check it out! Have a Happy New Year!
Pingback: Retro Wednesday {2011 Year in Review} — Arkansas Women Bloggers()